Article Summary
“Where Is God in Our Grief?” explores the painful questions that arise in seasons of deep loss and uses C.S. Lewis’s honest reflections in A Grief Observed to show that even strong believers can feel abandoned and confused. Like the psalms of lament, Lewis cried out to God yet continued seeking Him, demonstrating that true faith brings raw emotion before the Lord rather than hiding it. Grief may distort our view of God, but He welcomes our pain, invites us to pour out our hearts, and sustains us as we wrestle. Though answers may not come quickly, God’s presence, compassion, and promise of eternal comfort remain certain, and one day He will wipe away every tear.
This article is adapted from our Keys for Living book on Grief: Living at Peace with Loss.
In The Chronicles of Narnia, C.S. Lewis invites readers into a magical world filled with wonder and truth. In Mere Christianity, he presents clear, reasoned arguments for the Christian faith. But in A Grief Observed, Lewis invites us into something far more raw and real – his personal agony after the death of his beloved wife, Joy.
He writes honestly about God’s perceived absence in the darkest hours of his life …
“… where is God? … go to Him when your need is desperate … and what do you find? A door slammed in your face … After that, silence … There are no lights in the windows. It might be an empty house. Was it ever inhabited? It seemed so once …” (C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed)
Lewis’s words echo the raw laments of Scripture – honest, unfiltered cries of grief.
“How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?” (Psalm 13:1–2)
“My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? … I cry out by day, but you do not answer …” (Psalm 22:1–2)
The Messiness of Grief
Grief isn’t neat – it’s necessary.
Lewis’s A Grief Observed is, in many ways, a modern-day psalm of lament. It gives voice to feelings many are afraid to speak. It shows us that grief can distort our perspective, cloud our view of God, and leave us feeling abandoned. Lewis wrote:
“The time when there is nothing at all in your soul except a cry for help may be just the time when God can’t give it … Perhaps your own reiterated cries deafen you to the voice you hoped to hear.” (C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed)
But here’s the key: Lewis didn’t stop knocking. He didn’t stop praying. He didn’t stop seeking. That’s what faith does – even when confused or hurting, it turns to God.
Grief and faith often walk hand-in-hand, not on the mountaintop, but through the valley. And when Lewis laid his pain before God, something changed:
“When I lay these questions before God, I get no answer. But … it is not the locked door. It is … a silent, certainly not uncompassionate, gaze … Like, ‘Peace, child; you don’t understand.’” (C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed)
Grieving with God
God doesn’t reject us in our pain – He welcomes us.
“Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.” (Psalm 62:8)
The Psalms are filled with gut-wrenching emotion. They model what it looks like to come to God angry, afraid, confused, or grieving – and still cling to Him. That’s what Lewis teaches us. That’s what Scripture teaches us.
“Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved.” (Psalm 55:22)
Whether you're grieving the loss of a loved one, walking someone through death, or just facing deep pain, bring your emotions and questions to the Lord. He can handle them. He welcomes them. He welcomes you.
The Promise of Hope
We may not get all the answers, but we get God.
His presence. His peace. His promises.
And one day, He will wipe away every tear and silence every question.
“Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people … He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain …” (Revelation 21:3–4)
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