June Hunt on Suicide Prevention – “The Lord Understands Your Pain”

November 2016

Too many people have said or heard the words: “I just don’t want to live anymore.”

Sadly, more than 800,000 people each year die by suicide around the world and many more make an attempt.¹ This equates to one death by suicide about every 40 seconds throughout the world. How tragic that so many believe that death is the only solution to stop their pain.

When hope is shattered, the Lord is still looking upon the hurting with tender care and compassion. The Bible says that God is “the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles” (2 Corinthians 1:3–4). So what should you do if someone in your life has lost all hope? A recent story illustrates the importance of a contract when counseling those considering suicide.

A former staff member recently told me, “The first Biblical Counseling Intensive I attended focused on suicide. The content was unforgettable. In fact, just last week I met a man who was suicidal—and he had a plan for how he would end his life. Because of what I learned from the Biblical Counseling Keys, I knew exactly what to do—I presented ‘The Contract of Hope.’ Ultimately, he promised to keep the contract!”

Never forget, everyone struggling with suicidal thoughts needs hope…

So what does “The Contract of Hope” entail?

H — Honestly Confront.
(1) Take all talk of death seriously. Repeat what was said: “I’m hearing you say that life’s not worth living. Is that correct?” (2) Identify with their pain and express your concern: “That must feel painfully empty. I want you to know I care about your pain.” (3) Ask direct questions: “Are you thinking about harming yourself? Do you have a plan? How … ?” (4) Try to find out what is causing the pain. Ask: “What has been so painful that you don’t want to live?”

O — Offer Other Options for Processing Pain.
(1) Acknowledge the fact that life is sometimes hard. (2) Point out: “Sometimes our choices or options for dealing with life’s pain are unpleasant, but some options are better than others.” (3) On paper, list possible alternative options for dealing with their problems and pain.  Have the struggler rank the options in order of preference. (4) Communicate God’s purposes for suffering. For example, one purpose is to develop compassion: “Many people like you are hurting … feeling desperately alone, assuming no one understands their pain. You know what it’s like to hurt. Your pain enables you to have compassion. Right now, you’re being prepared to be a lifeline of hope for someone who feels hopeless.”

P — Present a Contract.
(1) Build your relationship by showing your willingness to help. (2) Ask the struggler to make a contract with you: “Will you promise that if you are considering harming yourself, you will call me before doing anything?” (3) Obtain a signature—both of you sign and date the contract. (4) Make a commitment to stay in contact.

E — Enlist Help.
(1) Encourage the person to have a physical checkup. (2) Seek a trained counselor or therapist. (3) Contact a Suicide Crisis Center. (4) Contact a pastor for prayer and spiritual help.

If you are ever in such pain, my first words of counsel would be: “Tell someone.” Talking about your pain opens the door for hope, help, and healing. Jesus says … “The truth will set you free” (John 8:32). Telling the truth about how you’re feeling may be the first step toward finding freedom and healing.

The Lord understands your pain.

Isaiah 53:3 says that Jesus was “a man of suffering, and familiar with pain.” And from His tender heart springs words of hope … “Anyone who is among the living has hope” (Ecclesiastes 9:4).

And for those of you whom God is leading to help someone who has lost hope, pray for the right heart—God’s heart—as you offer help. Then present His words of hope. The Lord says … “I know the plans I have for you … plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11).

At Hope For The Heart, our ministry is about sharing hope every day—biblical hope and practical help. My prayer is that the Lord will powerfully impact your life and will equip you to help save the life of someone struggling with thoughts of suicide.

June Hunt

If you’re on Facebook, I invite you to connect with me at Facebook.com/June.Hunt.Hope. And if you’re not, take it from me: You’re never too old to start! See you there!

For your convenience, you can donate to this ministry via our website, www.HopeForTheHeart.org.

1. World Health Organization, “Suicide Fact Sheet,” reviewed September 2016,
http://www.who.int/mediacentre/factsheets/fs398/en/.

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation copyright © 1996, 2004, 2007, 2013 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved. New Living, NLT, and the New Living Translation logo are registered trademarks of Tyndale House Publishers.